Learning how to step into your control is incredibly empowering. When you discover how much control you really can have over your life, it serves as a total game-changer: You realize that you are quite powerful and have a lot of say over your life and how things work for you.
If you are not accustomed to being in control of your life, it can feel a little demoralizing when you first get started. However, with some practice and perseverance, learning how to step into your control and take more charge in your life is possible.
What does it mean to step into your control?
Think of stepping into your control like taking over the driver’s seat of a car. Instead of letting someone else decide where the car goes, how you are getting there, and how it’s driven, you get to call all the shots.
Think of your own life like the car – when you are the person controlling your life, you get to call the shots about where you are going, how you are getting there, and what happens along the way.
Stepping into your control is a major part of living your best life because it gives you the power to define what your best life is and how you are going to get yourself there.
What are some strategies for learning how to step into your control?
1. Take some time to explore what really, truly inspires and drives you.
Take a hard look at all your current goals, dreams, and aspirations. Do they suit your interests, or are you merely trying to please someone else?
Many people are surprised to learn that their goals and dreams are direct reflections of what other people want or expect them to do in life.
For example, many undergraduates choose academic majors because their parents dream of specific careers for them rather than their own professional or personal interests. Others may make decisions based on their friends or family members’ ideas rather than their own.
Take some time to examine what you want in your own life – not what others are expecting or anticipating you to do – and then determine if your pathway needs to change so you can be in control of your life and future.
2. Master the art of responding instead of reacting to situations.
When something shocking or unexpected happens in life, it is easy to react immediately instead of waiting to respond. By waiting to respond to something, you are allowing yourself to step aside, think about what happened carefully, and formulate a plan to handle it. When you react to something, you act immediately and impulsively, which can lead to mistakes and regret afterward.
To avoid this, take more control by practicing taking time to respond rather than immediately reacting. This can take practice and time to master – reacting is often an automatic habitual response.
3. permit yourself to let go of things that are beyond your realm of control.
As much as humans would love to be able to control everything in their lives, it is just not possible. There will always be aspects of life that you absolutely cannot control, no matter how careful and calculated you are in your actions.
When these types of events and situations arise, practice letting them go. Often, this happens through the art of acceptance. Learning how to accept that something is outside of your control makes it easier to process and then let go. While letting something go may seem like you are relinquishing your control, you are empowering yourself to move forward from what happened instead of getting trapped within it.
